Hey Juan

This time last year I was banging my cab into the curbs up in Jersey, broke and miserable. The garden state had worn me out like an abusive spouse. I was determined to stop being a co dependent of the nation's most dysfunctional state. A fellow cab driver, Waffle had placed in my head the crazy notion of moving to New Orleans. Most of my coworkers didn't think I would ever move. That's the attitude in Jersey, no matter how miserable you are, there is no place else to live.

 I shared my ambitions with Juan, one of my favorite passengers. A young man who if he was any mellower people would check his pulse, an artist and musician. He had friends whose band had played down in New Orleans and told him how great it was. Juan has followed my exploits and struggles since I hopped the barbed wire fence surrounding Jersey and kept running. Between this blog and our facebook contact, he has egged me on and provided encouragement at just the right times.



I'm getting the impression that he's not too happy back in Jersey. The term Waffle kept using to lure me down to the Big Easy was "Come down to be with like minded individuals." Waffle didn't exaggerate. I found folks who were only concerned with creating art, food and music, and for the most part not interested with materialism. Don't get me wrong, it's not perfect. This city is filled with either hustlers or the hustled. The economy isn't much better than the northeast, but if you are going to be poor this is the place to do it. A wealthy man will say good morning to a homeless man with as much respect as if he was talking to a judge.

If you come down with a couple of hundred in your pocket and ambition, not only will you survive, I bet you will be a lot happier. When you come down, we'll visit Waffle at Ms May's and have a beer and laugh at New Jersey together.

Flying in my taxi...

Back when I was diving cab in Belmar NJ at night I would get some drunk in the car pissing and moaning about his $12 cab ride. "I bet you guys make $300 - $400 a night." Uh, yea. I worked for a company that had about a dozen or so drivers, each working 12 hour shifts 5 days or nights a week. It was a company owned vehicle that my boss paid for the maintenance and insurance and we split the cost of fuel 50/50.  When fuel prices went through the roof, I had to spend $40 out of my pocket for half of the gas.


My paycheck was based on a 40/60% split of the night's book, 40%  for me, 60% for the company. A good "average" night would be $200 book, $80 for me, $120 for the boss. It was her car, dispatchers and overhead. $200 book might come with $50 - $80 in tips, so $150 a shift in pocket was decent. Of course along with it came abusive alcoholics, college girls puking on you and the constant threat of a crackhead stabbing you in the neck with a rusty knife. In the summer with the "Jersey Shore" crowd the driving was non stop along with the aggravation. A Saturday night in July you might take home $225 with your migraine and hatred for humanity.

When the economy started to take a dive bartenders in my cab were crying the blues too "Everyone is buying a six pack and staying home." I thought "Good, they're all assholes anyway." Of course this didn't pay the bills. The calls for cabs got fewer and the tips dropped off, on a Monday night in the winter I might book $80 with $20 in tips. After dumping $20 to $30 in the gas tank of my Crown Vic I walked away with less than fifty bucks in my pocket for 12 hours of sitting in the cold.

The last few months I drove, by payday I might have $100 in tips, and maybe a $200 paycheck. From the $200 paycheck $110 was taken out for child support. Now for the record I have no problem with paying for my kid. However the state of New Jersey seemed to be under the impression that cab drivers must not report thousands in gratuities. I was liked as a driver, but not that much.




I'd open up my pay check envelope to find a check for $90 for 60+ hours of work. I shared a house with two other guys in a winter rental off of 18th ave where we each paid $700 a month in rent. Yep, $2,100 for a winter rental where the landlord would let himself in unannounced and turn down the thermostat because WE were costing him a fortune. But that's another rambling tirade....


Why did I quit my job and move down here? Do I need to explain further?

An open letter to NJ Governor Christie

Governor Christie,
In March of 2010 I had to quit my job in Belmar NJ driving cab at night after working there for almost 5 years. Working 60 to 70 hours a week I was only taking home $250 or less in my paycheck and tips. After my child support obligation of $110 a week was garnished I was left with less than $150 a week to live on. My rent was $175 a week, so you can see how mathematically I could not survive on the remaining income. Employment opportunities in New Jersey as well as the rest of the nation is so poor that I could not find a better paying position, and with working 70 hours a week a part time job was not an option.

In March I moved down to New Orleans, La. to hopefully find employment and a less expensive environment to live in. Upon arriving in New Orleans and applying for NJ unemployment insurance I was denied benefits because I had voluntarily quit my employment in NJ. I did not quit to move down here for better weather and Mardi Gras, I see myself more as an economic refuge in the vein of the "Grapes of wrath."

After working in the fine state of New Jersey and paying into unemployment insurance for over 25 years without ever collecting it, I was turned down. (By the way, you may want to chat with those down in NJUI about their tones towards taxpayers.)  Employment opportunities down here are not much better, and I am surviving on luck and an occasional day's work.

I applaud your recent efforts to cut back on spending, waste and abuse of taxpayer's dollars. However after 25 years of paying into a system that was suppose to be there in a time of need, I think this warrants a little grace. As of now, I am quite far behind on my child support which I paid weekly in Jersey even though it meant falling behind on all other living costs.

ALL I am asking from the State of New Jersey, is to apply my unemployment benefits towards my child support obligations. Nothing more. I would not personally see or spend a dime of it, the unemployment insurance would go to my ex wife for the benefit of our 13 year old daughter. The money would remain in New Jersey's local economy, and I would fend for myself the best I can here in Louisiana.

Thank you sir for your time, regardless of the out come of my situation I wish you the very best with your efforts in New Jersey.

Eric T Styles

A Holiday Favorite

Forget "It's a Wonderful Life" this is my Christmas favorite.  Last summer I worked on a film with a production assistant who was really cool. As we smoked cigarettes and downed our tenth cup of coffee he mentioned that the previous year he had worked on a film with Billy Bob Thorton.  

 

"Yea? What is he like?" I asked.
"He's the coolest"

My buddy told how early one morning on the set Billy Bob was gone for a few minutes and then came back brooding. The P.A. asked Mr. Thorton if there was a problem. Billy Bob said he was just trying to get some coffee. It seems that Billy Bob had time to walk down to a local coffee shop before the shoot but never got a cup.

The somewhat gushing production assistant quickly volunteered to go get the coffee for the star. "No, you don't understand" said  Billy. The actor just wanted to walk a few blocks down to the shop and buy a cup just like anyone else. However about half way to the shop he was so overwhelmed by pedestrians recognizing him, talking to him and asking for autographs that he had to turn around and sequester himself to the closed set.

It's a double edged sword for celebrities, fame and all that goes along with it. If you should see a celeb on the street, just a nod or a "hi" is suffice, no photos, no autographs.

"All I wanted was a damn Cappuccino."

Position Sought

Please do not call or fax, email us at the above address and tell us why we should hire you. 

This was the last sentence in a Craigslist ad for a position for a graphic artist not to far from here. So here is my cover letter to the marketing and advertising company on why they should hire me as a graphic artist.

1) I need the work. I have been unemployed since March '10. I have been surviving on a few temporary positions and luck. I will take any and all hours offered, overtime will be welcomed.

2) Experiance with print, web and signage graphics. I have been trained on Mac based Adobe programs Photoshop and Illustrator and Quark. I have worked with Indesign.  I am confidant that I can learn any needed skills in a short period of time.

3) Creativity is one of the few things I can boast about. Given an idea of what is needed and I will excel to give you a quality product .

4) I have worked in management, I consider myself to be a good employee. I do not waste time at the water cooler bitching about the boss or company that I work for. As long as my paycheck clears at the end of the week, I have no complaints.

5) Examples of my work can be found on this blog and my web site artbystyles.com.

RESUME

Objective

A graphics design position that allows me to utilize and improve my skills with challenging projects and is open to my creative solutions with minimal direction.

Qualifications

Cartoonist / writer – 2005 to Present
Creator of the comic "BiNGE", storyline and characters of the web based comic as well as all promotional and merchandise. Currently involved with the marketing of the comic as a television animation project.

Freelance Artist – painting / sculpture 2000 to Present
Artistic works previously displayed at: A Mano Gallery, New Hope, PA and Lambertville, NJ, Lavender Moon, Belmar, NJ, Divine Madness Gallery Asbury Park, NJ, 500 Main Street Gallery, Belmar NJ, Artistic works currently on display at:Greetingz from Asbury Park NJ.

Internet Graphics Artist
Designed and constructed artbystyles.com and Bedsoar.com. Logo design work completed for: Player-care.com, LearningChoices.com, WPDQ Radio; Howell, NJ, Automated Concepts Vending Services. Freelance graphic work for numerous internet web sites.

Newspaper Freelance
Weekly: The Reporter and The Observer 300+ works for Rockfleet Media

Employment

Background Actor New Orleans La
March 2010 to Present
Background extra work in numerous film and television productions

Street Performer New Orleans La
Juggler March 2010 to Present
Juggling and humor, French Quarter

Belmar Car Service Belmar NJ
Cab Driver August 2005 to 2010
Nightshift cab driver, twelve hour shifts, 5 to 6 nights a week.

Offshore International Point Pleasant NJ
Graphic Artist April 2005
Responsible for the design advertisements, and graphics for a sport fishing catalog.

Cat Fanciers Association Manasquan NJ
Graphic Artist August 2004 to February 2005
Responsible for the layout and design of over 300 advertisements and show cat yearbook pages. With creative license and minimal supervision completed assignment on time and on budget.

Garden State Sign Co. Howell, NJ
Sign Service Technician April 2001 to August 2004
Project managed the manufacture and installation of new signs. Factory trained for service of installed computer based signs such as time and temp and L.E.D. gas price signs. Assisted with the completion of computer designed corporate signs. Medium used: Neon, Vinyl lettering, gold leaf, router carved wood, and hand painted signs. Factory trained and certified technician for Milwaukee signs and Ever-Brite signs systems.

A&M Signs Farmingdale, NJ
Sign Service Technician October 2000 to March 2001
Assisted with the manufacture, installation, and service of signs.

TCT Transit Services Neptune NJ
Shift Supervisor June 1996 to October 2000
Started as shift bus driver, within eight months promoted to shift supervisor. Responsible for training, supplying, and scheduling 30 drivers.

The Leader Point Pleasant, NJ
Editorial Cartoonist 1990 to 1995
Weekly pen and ink editorial cartoon. Responsible for humorous word and picture interpretation of editor supplied topic. Also work done for The Observer, The Reporter, Toms River NJ

Education

DDP Training Center Freehold, NJ
Software Training
Macintosh OS 9.2, OS 10
Quark Xpress 5.1
Adobe Illustrator 10
Photoshop 7.0
Image Ready 7.0
Macromedia Fireworks 4
Dreamweaver 4
Microsoft PowerPoint


References are available upon request.

Negative Vibes

I don't know if it's just my corner of the world or if everyone is experiencing a real negative atmosphere lately. I am memorized by the constant feed of news that seems to out do it's self in a 24 hour cycle. Gruesome and cruel murders making the national news, a police state of molestation at the airport, rogue nations bitch slapping neighbors, national credit ratings far worse than my own and our President getting an elbow to the mouth while he's playing B-ball. 

 

I never gave much credence to the whole 2012 end of the world theory, at my age I have lived through a half a dozen end of the worlds. After a while you realize it's just writers selling books to gullible drama queens who want to build shelters in their backyards. I am beginning to wonder now a days. I half expect to wake up some morning to find huge space crafts hovering over every major city and announcing that the experiment is over. They must purge humanity from the petre dish we call Earth before it spreads and infects the rest of the universe like a oozing STD. 

I am almost looking forward to the end of the world, perhaps then those damn phone calls from the collection agencies will end. 

Don't you want to be in that number.....

A little background work is starting to come in. The film industry slows down every year from August to about late October. Hurricane season. No producer wants to get half way through filming a project and then have to evacuate. His set might be gone when he returns. Tonight I did a "REVEL" down at the Roosevelt Hotel.

A convention was being held and to make it in true New Orleans style, a brass jazz band marches into the room and a parade starts. The band played loud and sharp as we reveled in behind them in our costumes. We met the guests at the end of cocktail hour and paraded them through the grand lobby of the Roosevelt Hotel to dinner.

THE ROOSEVELT

Great fun for everyone. Colorful costumes flinging beads at drunk optometrists. We paraded the party downstairs and thru a magnificent grand lobby and back upstairs to the dinning room. In the lobby were two of my friends wearing big heads. Sweating their asses off to pose for hundreds of cell phone pictures.

Yep, it's considered a job down here. It was the first Revel for my friend Bobby from Philadelphia. He did great, he has a Mummer background.

 I just can't get "When the Saints go marching in" out of my head now.

Take a walk, we'll tax your feet

Craigslist Responce

I posted my blog ATTENTION TRENTON on Craigslist Central NJ "Rants & Raves" to see what kind of a response it would get.

It is not a personal savings account that you can tap into when you hit hard times. It is not YOUR money. It is basically a tax....Get used to it. I pay THOUSANDS of dollars in taxes to everyone and I dont get anything back. You paid for years into a system that will give you NOTHING back in return. Thats why we all hate democrats. 

First off: With the tax came a promise that it would be used on Unemployment benefits, NOT building roads and bridges that are over priced because of kick backs. Just like the Feds did with social security tax. Taking it under the premise that it would be there when we need it. Now we hear "Opps, we spent it." 

Second: GET USE TO IT? This reply must've been written by a State Government employee. Perhaps you could replace the state motto on your license plate from "The Garden State" to "GET USED TO IT." He evidently is just a hack bitch who willingly gives it up in taxes, then expects nothing promised in return.

Third: Let's blame the Dems?  Are you so naive to trust either party any more? It's good cop / bad cop and we fall for it every election. Our choice is what we deem the lesser of two evils.


This was my favorite response on Craiglist Rant and Rave:

Your taxes implied you would receive services if needed????
- Dont you think your tax dollars go to ANYTHING whereby you benefit? That is a shame your state taxes done benefit you in any way shape or form. I guess you run to put out fires that could burn down your community, heaven forbid. I guess you run out there and direct traffic when the traffic lights go out. I guess you drive up and down shoveling all the roads so you can make it to work. I guess you empty your own garbage at the dump yourself....Negro, please.....be for real. 


No, those things were supposed to be paid for by the other taxes, property tax, income tax, sales tax and dog licenses. Every time they introduce a new tax it was to address a particular deficit, or to fund new programs. Do we ever see the direct result from that tax? No, it goes into a spitoon of spending. I did not want my social security money funding the cold war either.  (he called me a negro)

I ain't no Mark Levine, but I wanted to get that off of my chest.

The other La

There are more major film productions this year in Louisiana than anywhere else in the country. Why? This state offers excellent tax refunds to film investors.  A THIRTY PERCENT tax incentive is given to those who film in Louisiana. The next Batman film will be shot here next summer. To put it in perspective, if the budget is $200 million, the state will give $60 million in tax credit back. Imagine, a state offering tax breaks to encourage business. Would New Jersey do that?

No, a $200 million dollar film anywhere else would cost $250 million in NJ. Between political kick backs, mob shake downs and the unions with their hands out, no producer in the country would want to go there.  Three union electricians to plug in one extension cord, Teamsters sitting around doing nothing but laughing at how much they get paid to do nothing. Louisiana is a right to work state, a few unions get involved but not to the point of choking to death the employer.

So with the rest of the country floundering in economic chaos, LA has a steady industry keeping us employed. Oh I forgot,  you are all so proud of "Jersey Shore" Wait, aren't they filming that someplace else this season?

Double Take

A friend shot me an e-mail from a casting company looking for a double for an actor. A double is someone of same height, build and appearance of the principal actor. Setting up a camera shot can take a long time to get lighting and blocking right. A stand in takes the place of a principal during the set up so the actor can remain in his or her comfortable dressing room until the director is ready to shoot.


When I worked Memphis beat, both stand in actors looked or were shaped nothing like the principals they were filling in for. The stand in for Jason lee is about 5 inches shorter and 40 pounds heavier than Jason, and with less hair than my ass. He must be some one's brother in law.  The e mail that I was sent had a photo of the actor Miguel Ferrer. Photo double needed, 6'1" medium build. I saw the e mail and thought "Yea, so? Why did you send it to me?"

A couple hours later my friend asked if they called me yet? "Who? About what?" Oh that. If you think so. I sent a photo in and with in 10 minutes received a call back. They asked for a most recent photo to forward to the director. I didn't get the photo double work but did get a call back for background work. Just as well. Even though stand in work is a step up from background with a little better pay and better food, I was happy with just background.


I ran into a number of background extras that I knew, all said it's been really slow for the past couple of months.  I ended up coming in late because of being contacted last minute. That was fine, I spoke with a buddy there who said they had sat in holding for the past 3 hours and hadn't been to the set. About 3 or 4 backgrounds came up to me and commented that I was a good stand in for Miguel. "But I didn't get the part." "Really? Ya kiddin? You kinda look like him"  Yea, well it's a cold heartless business.


We sat from 9pm until about 2:30 am until we were brought out to the casino. This scene was being shot at Harrah's. The second second assistant director (very sweet young lady) sat me and a couple of other backgrounds at a roulette wheel. The real casino dealer gave us each about $100 in practice chips and we started to play. He was cool and explained the game to us since none of us had ever played roulette. About 20 minutes passed as I waited to hear "BACKGROUND ACTION."


To my surprise the 2nd 2nd A.D. yelled "It's a wrap, thank you everybody." They had shot 3 takes with the actors and a steady cam and we never even knew they were filming. All of us were paid $100 cash and sent home. I had taken the ferry over to Harrah's and it wasn't running again until 6:00 am back to the West Bank where I live. What can I do in New Orleans at 3:00 in the morning with a $100 in my pocket? Ok, one beer.


I am proud of myself. On the walk down Canal Street I had three prostitutes asked if I was looking for fun. "No thanks honey" and I kept walking. I see this as a sign of personal growth. One beer later I looked at my watch and it was only 3:30 am.  I had trouble finishing my beer and just wanted to be home. I splurged on a $20 cab ride just to go to bed. 


Oh yea, the film is called THE COURIER

manic self-publicist

Here is my ad for the Quarter Rat Publication, to be hitting hotel lobbies, strip clubs, massage parlors and beer soaked bars across the French Quarter this month. Check out their web site with back issues. Very funny stuff. It's a publication directed toward the locals. Lot's of humor from those in the service industry. Almost a venue for everyone to share the aggravation of living and working in a tourist hot spot.

THE QUARTER RAT

I share the feelings. I drove taxi for five years at night on the Jersey Shore. Yea, like the TV show. When drunken assholes who pay your bills it's like being stuck in an abusive relationship. I am convinced that most serial killers at one time worked in the service industry. Bartenders, servers, cab drivers and hookers, we all know what it's like.

Zaphod Beeblebrox, adventurer, ex-hippy, good timer, manic self-publicist, terribly bad at personal relationships, often thought to be completely out to lunch.

Do I miss New Jersey yet?

Nope, not yet.

Meet an artist

A few months ago I hung out in the French Quarter on warm evening nursing a beer and checking out some art. Two types of art down here, stuff for the tourists and really good art. Most of the galleries on Royal Street were closed by the time that I got over there. I prefer to just look in the windows anyway. Ironically the only time I'm ever comfortable in an art gallery is if it's my work on the wall. Other than that I don't belong in one.

One gallery's art stopped me dead in my tracks. The interior looked more like an English pub than an art gallery. Moody lights highlighted some inspiring artwork. Great cityscapes with taxis and buses. Beautiful scantily clad female figures done with taste and grace. Really cool work. I stood in front of the gallery somewhat melancholy as my buzz was fading. About four doors down, a scruffy street performer strummed on an equally weathered guitar. He picked away at "Margaretaville" as I took my last looks before I cruised on back home.

Out of all of the artist's work I saw that night, this was the only work I googled upon returning home. Turned out that he was a fellow New Jersian.  Peter O'Niell.

Visit him on FaceBook: Peter O'Niell

meet the new boss

The other day I got a call from an old buddy who found me on Facebook. We had worked together at the sign company years ago. Richie seemed surprise that I had moved down here to New Orleans. Things were about the same for everybody back in the sign shop. Richie asked what I was doing for a living since I moved down to NOLA. I hemmed and hawed that the only work I could find was as a background actor.

I'm not sure if he believed me at first, but yea it's where I get most of my income. He laughed and said it sounded like fun. I then remembered my old boss Joe. He cut me a lot of breaks and I owe him. However, there were the occasional sarcastic or condescending comments from him. I told Richie to let Joe know that one of my new bosses is George Clooney.



In Jersey it's called Ballbusting.

Huey P Long

Dress Code Blue

I'm starting to dress like these people. I have one room mate who has adopted the NOLA dress code of pajamas and funky tees to work. He literally jumps out of bed and sprints to a curbside bus. He's the one who got me this "Jersey Shore Fist Pump Champ" shirt.  Others have introduced us to this garb.

One of my friends has a job at a CBD office building. He's a visual special effects artist on a ghost film. Some of his lawyer neighbors in the building have been pissy about some long haired guy wearing pajamas in the smoking area. While they stand outside in a suite and tie.

I bet at night they were asking themselves "Where can I get a job that allows me to go to work in pajamas?"

almost deleted this...

I was cleaning up my hard drive and almost deleted this sketch for a tattoo I did. I thought I'd run it through photoshop to see what I could do with it. The guy wanted a cobra wrapped around a panther. I drew a pretty good cobra, then he holds up a pic of a dragon. "I want it to look like a winged dragon, but a cobra snake." This is as close as I could get. He didn't care for it, "Too biker, I wanted more Asian."

Ok, have fun.

Don't always fear losing a job you don't like anyhow

 At this time last year, I was driving a cab at night on the Jersey Shore. Yea, like the TV show. I even have had those guys in my taxi. I drove three or four of the gombas from D-Jaise on Ocean Ave in Belmar NJ to the Headliner in Neptune. The one with the hair and ink gets in the front seat and the first words out of his mouth "J'ever ear uv a shoe culled da jerzey shor?"  I reply "Nope. I hope I never do."
Lousy tippers. 

Dealing with that crowd in mass, being beat out of fares. At two am having to clean puke up off of the backseat before I can use the car again to make money. Every silhouette that sat behind me could be holding a razor knife to my throat at any minute. Cops with hard-ons for cabbies because his ex banged one once.

NJ is the forth most expensive state to live in. Mostly due to corruption between the politicians, unions and the mob. Bureaucrats and contractors sucking the Jersey Girl's tits dry. The economy got so bad, people just weren't blowing money at the bars as much. The money dried up for us in the winter and every week I fell further behind. F Jersey, I'm moving to New Orleans, if I got to be poor, let it be someplace cheaper.

My complaint this morning at work was that the stunt people get bacon with breakfast and we don't.  Walking by all sorts of cool gizmos and craters. It's like getting caught in the middle of MYTHBUSTERS. F*ckin cool. Cars are rigged to blow up, much like Taxi cabs that do when in need maintenance.

The only thing I miss about New Jersey is my kid. I can't wait to bring her down here for a visit, let her know that life is better outside of the Garden State.

Dress for success

This afternoon I went for a wardrobe fitting for an upcoming film background role. Due to extremely tight security and confidence I can not give you too many details concerning the shoot. I was contacted to be part of a scene involving hundreds of background extras. The casting company told me to bring attire of a "business man" to the fitting. With about 40 pounds of suites and dress shirts in my bag I made my way to the wardrobe fitting.

The costumer looked at me, then at my paperwork and back at me. "Don't these casting agents ever look at your photos? You are NOT a business man type, you are a stoner - beach bum type." "Uhm, well, yea, I guess I could play that. I don't really like the beach though." She turns to her coworker and announces "I found the one to wear "THE" shirt." Evidently the lead wardrobe lady has a favorite shirt that she likes to work into the background of films she works on.

I really dig watching the wardrobe people work. I'm not a clothes type of person. However, I see the art of what they do with costumes. The one who dressed me showed thought and enthusiasm in her work, they all did. Where else can I get a girl half my age to measure my inseam.

I wore the shirt and shorts given to me, along with a pair of Jesus creeper sandals. After much searching a straw pork pie hat that could fit my head was added. When I emerged with my sunglasses on, the second wardrobe lady shrieked "THE DUDE ABIDES!" A reference from one of my favorite films. We start shooting in a couple of weeks. I hope I don't start getting type cast as an unemployed stoner.

LEBOWSKI
Are you employed, sir?

DUDE
Employed?

LEBOWSKI
You don't go out and make a living dressed like that in the middle of a weekday.

DUDE
Is this a--what day is this?